This Grown-up Stuff is Hard

      Up in the middle of the night, smelling a horrible dog fart, looking for a sign that I may have made, in the words of most of the characters on Arrested Development, "a horrible mistake" in career decision.

     This decision crisis is coming earlier to me than from what I have seen from most nursing students. Mainly because I have so much riding on every decision I make concerning school. How much study time do I put in versus, being able to function at my current job versus family time.

      It is rough out here in the real world.

     It is also tough for me because I have made so many career changes, most admittedly not of my own choosing. I feel that I have often stumbled into what many would call successes, mainly on the backs and coat tails of others. Somehow, I have ended up with a beautiful, and more than a little understanding, wife and a little boy who looks at me with such love that I tear up just thinking about it.
    
     I love my work and UK. I know this is the right place for me, but I am not getting any younger. You can only bounce back professionally so many times. I always fear, that this may be the last bounce, that if things don't go in the correct direction, the fragile "house of cards" will come crashing down.

     The best consolation, is that I have the wife, successful in her own right. That we have an amazing support system in her family. Finally, I have that little boy who needs me to win. Who needs me to find that confidence and career that will make him want to be just like his Daddy.

     This Grown-Up stuff is hard.

Lighter Notes:

 

 

     We had a great Boys' Nite tonight. Glad all four of us could get together and they could spend some time with Quinn. During our NO QUINN ALLOWED TIME, we watched they very funny, PIRANHA 3D. This movie is truly only for adults and 13 yr old boys to sneak and watch on HBO late at night. It is juvenile and bloody with a wink to the camera with every bikini close-up and every skull left behind. Highly recommended for the "so intentionally bad, that it is unintentionally good" crowd. Also, it is as R rated as they come.

 

     We turned our IPhones back on and with little hesitation, I reactivated my Facebook account. Of course, little has changed. The under-informed continue to shout the loudest, while saying the least. I am sure many find me the same way. Dropped a few people and hid news feed updates from more. It is practically embedded in your phone that Facebook accounts be a part of every application. C'est la vie....

 

Peace and Hair Grease to all.....

 

 

 

Home on Sunday Morning

What can I say this boy is hilarious, the wife is great and a quiet Sunday at home was much needed for all...

Life Disconnected

     Since my last post, I have restarted, then gave up facebook again. I find the political rantings of people who are not directly involved in my life (and even more so, of those who are), such a waste of brain usage that I just couldn't handle it anymore.

     I did realize that facebook "addiction" is real and kinda scary. I do feel strangely disconnected from the rest of the world. Disconnected and not "in the know' about the comings and goings of those around me. Strange how ten years ago, letters were written, phone calls were made. Life seem to happen at a less immediate pace. There was life documentation, pre-facebook, pre-twitter, pre-Myspace. Pictures, letters, notes, cards and most importantly, a phone call. There are people I used to connect with whose voices, I have truly forgotten the sound of because of lack of 1 to 1 connection.

     So yeah, if someone is truly interested in what is going on with me, they will have to pick up the phone, send at least a text, write me a note. I want to be a challenge. I want the life my family and I share to not just be another blip on the information superhighway, but something well documented, something well thought out. Making me take time for reflection about myself and what I see around me.

     I will continue to blog, with my four subscribers (Hell, my wife is not even a subscriber). Continue to talk about the things I love to read, listen to, and watch. Should the day come that I feel a need, I may spread the word about this page through methods other than my personal twitter feed and maybe word of mouth. For now, it is just me, writing. And no one really is looking. I like that.


TV SHOWS: http://www.nbc.com/revolution/ Revolution had a great first episode. Tammy was wondering how they will keep up that level of excitement every week. So am I.

Music: http://www.algreenmusic.com/ Tammy and I saw Al Green in concert this week. He was genuinely amazing to see and hear. His voice was lifting the roof off the place. Though he did think he was still in Lexington, when in fact we saw him at the EKU Center for the Arts in Richmond....

Movies: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0072245/ TNT JACKSON was a Boys' Nite winner from last week. I cannot believe some of the bad karate action this movie sports. It is an 70's exploitation film at its finest, or worst.

Family pic: This is an old cute one, I haven't synced up my phone and blog yet.

Peace and hair grease to all...

 

 

 

Giving up (on facebook) is hard to do.

I recently gave up facebook news feed reading.

I had too because my blood pressure could no longer handle the pre-election, under-educated madness I was reading almost daily.

Posts about the election, posts about religion, posts about the culture wars permeating through our state and country.

My wife made fun of me, rightly so. I am a rambler and ranter without conviction. A zealot in the religion of ME.

I even admit to cheating and looking tonight, scrolled my news feed one click and saw a post about the evil that is "Obama."

I will keep posting, keep tweeting, responding to friend requests and keep writing.

I just can't handle the stupid

The Day after Quinn Day

1am: The Boy just woke us up effectively kicking me out of bed again. He just can't sleep without snuggling. He fascinates me more everyday. He takes my baseball caps and puts them on his head, proud of wearing, as he puts it, "Daddy's Hat." His desire to emulate me, is the source of my biggest pride and biggest fear. I have accomplished a lot, but have very little in the bank or "social status" to show for it. Like every parent, I want him to be able to face challenges with strength and with a resolve for success that I have rarely had.
His adoption was finalized to years ago yesterday, I am praying and meditating on the hope of putting aside old fears and failures so that as he grows he can find more reasons to emulate me other than that we both can rock a ball cap with swagger.

SPRING STAY-CATION

Tonight, I am sitting on my recliner with my arms propped up uncomfortably while I try to type before too many things escape my mind about the past week or so. The reason for the odd propping is because of a nasty case of poison ivy or oak or something I am allergic toothat has turned certain areas of my skin into a giant boil. This is not a sexy look for my “stay-cation”, but it is what it is.

I have been trying to fit in some movies during my time off and they have all been fairly entertaining in their own way. I saw the summer movie disaster, “The Last Airbender”, based on the wildly successful Nickelodeon cartoon. I don’t think, outside of Masters of the Universe from the 80’s, have I ever seen a movie take a simple premise that should work and mess it up as royally as they did here. The script is mind-numbing, the casting is just offensively bad, and that is being generous. Someone, somewhere along the way should have seen some dailies and thought that this wasn’t working. I just was dumbstruck by the poor decisions made with this movie. Not even Boys Nite worthy, just kind of sad.

Tammy and I had a movie day together, something we haven’t had in a very long time. We watched the weep-fest “Love Story” and I don’t think Tammy was too impressed. This had been the second or third time I have seen it, so I was mainly watching it for her reactions. They were fairly mixed.

We took an “intermission” and had lunch at The Lunch Box, which is a really great place. They are big on the 1980’s kids nostalgia, the food was fresh (much of it local produce and meats) and the atmosphere was family friendly, but plenty of adult beverages to be found on hand. I am looking forward to going back for dinner sometime soon.

We finished up our movie day with “Drive” starring Ryan Gosling, Albert Brooks and the Beast himself, Ron Perlman. I loved this film. It seemed plucked straight from the Michael Mann/Walter Hill catalog of movies from the 1980’s. Tammy even recognized this vibe from the opening credits. It was very music driven and the atmosphere (and Gosling’s scorpion jacket) was a solid match. I just can’t say enough about this movie. Rent it, buy it and you will love it.

Planning on giving the NBC show “Grimm” a shot, they have the full season on HULU right now, so I plan on taking a look and seeing if it is a good fit for me. The weekend ahead is filled with having some pleasant visits with friends, then some quiet time tomorrow afternoon. Sunday is church gatherings and Quinn spending lots of time with Tammy’s family. I hope that Boys Nite comes to fruition this week; we have a doozy of a flick on tap if we can pull it off. Otherwise, I plan on resting up for another work week.

Peace and hair grease….

Movie Day

Had a movie day with wife, made me think of one of my favorite movie posters. The poster used for
Day of the Dead.